During my financial learning process, I have realised that the most important quality I need to become a FIRE achiever is to befriend solitude.
Loneliness is a contradiction
So many people say they are lonely, and those who say they are lonely are not actually lonely. Loneliness is not being left out and abandoned, but having no confidant and not being understood. A true loner does not speak of loneliness, and occasionally whistles longingly, like a beast.
Many people are extremely able to tolerate loneliness, but are also very eager not to be lonely. People are sometimes so contradictory, but the complexity of human nature constantly verifies that this contradiction is reasonable to exist.
People are destined to be lonely
The world is not exactly the same for two people, which means people are destined to be alone. And people are good at living in groups, will feeling lonely is deeply rooted in the genes of human nature. So those who can overcome loneliness are very powerful, because that is fighting against the whole race (cool, isn’t it?). Understanding loneliness and trying to overcome it is the only way to know how to live with loneliness, and ultimately, how to start enjoying loneliness. So what is ‘enjoying loneliness‘? I have thought for a long time, and I think this is the most accurate way to describe it, that is, “not being alone, but ordinarily living with loneliness”. There is some flavour of entering the world before leaving the world. To do this, one needs to overcome the desire to be alone, the desire to conquer, and the desire to be understood. I don’t think it’s pure restraint. And to get to that level can be very pleasurable.
Enjoy solitude
A person who truly enjoys solitude must also enjoy love, because it is only in love that solitude can be experienced most completely and most profoundly, and it has to be a love that cannot be accomplished, that will not be accomplished. You will not be lonely if you live alone in a closed house, but you will be perfectly lonely if you are torn between the arms of a man and your little room, and if you finally give up the former and go back to the closet.
Tolstoy has a saying, “In relationships one is confronted with parts and crowds, but in solitude one is confronted with the whole and the source of all things”.
Being alone is a calming thing. Being alone amplifies one’s perception, allowing one to gain insight into one’s heart and discover new things in the calm.
Enjoy the true sense of being that being alone brings us, not the sense of loneliness.
Become a FIRE achiever
Solitude is a prerequisite for calmness, for inner peace and thus a kernel stabilised state. I think this is a necessary step to becoming a better FIRE achiever.
Follow my content if you agree with me. I know people have different points of view on this. Let me know your thoughts.
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